Reality check, it’s 8 pm, it’s getting dark and were still in the driveway. I still have to drive for 3 hours! When does the relaxing weekend start?
“Let’s get going, we were supposed to be there by now,” I yell from the driveway. “Start getting the kids in the car.”
Little did I know that I would be saying “let’s get going” for the next 20 some years. Correction, I would be yelling “let’s get going” for the next twenty some years. It’s a good thing I have a high tolerance for her lateness. Actually it’s a good thing I have high blood pressure pills.
We start making the final check of the house before we leave. Let’s see; the oven is off, all the windows are shut, the TV’s are off, a few lights on to scare the burglars away, and all the doors are locked, yada, yada, yada. It looks like we’re ready to go. “We can’t go yet,” Bonnie nonchalantly says. “What do you mean we can’t go yet,” I asked. “The kids are in the car and everything is packed?” “What’s the problem?” “My mother’s not here yet,” she says.
“Your Mother is going with us !!!!!”
Where did I put those high blood pills? All right calm down, calm down, I keep saying to myself. “Why didn’t you tell me she was coming with us?” “Oh yada, yada, yada,” she says. How about yada, yada, yada this............. I just love Seinfeld.
Bottom line is, were the hel---- heck is she going to sit. Maybe we should strap her to the bottom of the wagon since the top of it is already taken. Calm down, calm down……
Of course, Bonnie’s mother is not here yet and we’re all ready to leave. I guess being late is a hereditary trait, or better yet, a pain in the ass trait. It’s getting towards 9 PM and we still haven’t left.
Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, “Where the heck is she.” Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting,waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting. waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, “Why isn’t she here yet.” Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, 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waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, “If she’s not here in five minutes!” Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, 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“Finally she’s here.” (elapsed time,10 minutes). Ok, it felt like it was a lot longer.
So after another 30 minutes of packing manipulations and knot tying dexterity,
“Let’s get going!!!!!!!”
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